On Monday 6th May I found myself in the midst of a crowd of over 6,000 people. This was to be no ordinary gathering but the March of the Living from Auschwitz to Auschwitz-Birkenau. It was to be the moment that culminated the 5 days of the journey through Poland that we had experienced together and as we began to march through the famous gates led by our indomitable survivors with whom we had the privilege of spending the trip, I couldn’t help but reflect on the past 5 days from which I had learnt and took so much from.
Our trip began in the somewhat surprising humidity of Warsaw. We had made our way to the Warsaw Jewish Cemetery where over a quarter of a million Jews had been laid to rest. It was here where we were to begin our lessons into Jewish life and culture - gathered within this cemetery was not just simply gravestones and memorials but valuable insights into the pre-war history of the Jewish community and diversity that existed within it and the faith that is still maintained today through its preservation.
Later in the day we moved onto exploring the various memorials of remembrance that are situated around Warsaw. When engaging with memorials it can sometimes feel like the simplest route to try and take them for what they are or may seem to be, but with our group leader Yonni we took the approach of looking at the memorials through both an individual and group lens and with it seeing the hope, the loss and resistance that they have come to represent.
The second day of our journey took us to Majdanek, one of the six Nazi death camps. It was not how I may have anticipated hidden away in the vastness of the countryside but a neighbouring village with even houses and apartments backing on to it. There was an incomprehensible vastness that spoke to Majdanek for it felt as far as the eye could see there were the infamous barracks and stretches of barbed wire. It was within one of these barracks directly onlooking to the horrendous conditions prisoners faced we were addressed with the idea of choiceless choices, that when in such a circumstance what did the notion of choice represent and faced with such decisions, what would I have done? For such questions can be means a hard and in-depth search for answers.
As we left the vast surroundings of Majdanek, these thoughts weighed heavily on my mind, we had bore witness to a site that had overseen the loss of over 60,000 innocent lives and forced those chosen to make decisions that in cases meant survival or death, the comprehending of this all was certainly a significant toll emotionally.
We made our way to Łańcut Synagogue where we were surrounded by stunning architecture and paintings and learnt of the deep-rooted Jewish community that had been here pre-war before being wiped out in the Holocaust. Our experience here however was to not just be about the past but the future, so led by our rabbi’s we enacted a period of singing and dancing symbolizing that we were breathing new life into the Synagogue with hope and optimism for the future. The end of the day then saw us enter the Buczyna forest - it was here that 800 orphan children were taken and murdered not by Nazis but by collaborators, what brings an ordinary person to become a mass murderer seemed an impossible question to try and fathom, we made our way to the memorial where we held a lighting of candles to remember the intolerable loss that took place, in the darkness we saw light came through the candles in remembering them all.
For the first time in 5 years, March of the Living was coinciding with Shabbat and this meant for some of our group, including myself, experiencing our very first Shabbat. On a trip which in its nature is a fully packed itinerary, it was a chance to reflect and come together and share our experiences, the highs and lows. The Shabbat experience for me represented an incredibly special part of the trip, the Havdalah which marked the end of Shabbat saw the room filled with an indescribable energy, its beauty not only came from the lighting of the candles, but the singing enacted by the Youth movements which filled the room with emotions of joy and strength for what lay ahead.
The last two days of our trip would be spent at Auschwitz and Birkenau. It is no easy task but having been to Auschwitz twice before I believe in the importance of going to such a place with a clear mind, this therefore lets the emotions and thoughts come naturally to us rather than burdening ourselves with any expectations. As we made our way down the ramp we thought and reflected on what it represented, the fear and horror and how in a matter of minutes, the finger indicated to the other right or left, meant life or death for those taking the very steps we were embarking on. Visiting Auschwitz and the museum, it was hard to comprehend the scale of the loss that took place, for each shoe we could see the vast amounts on show represented a story and innocent life taken. Walking around the barracks and living conditions you are again reminded, as we were in Majdanek, of the daily decisions made by inmates that could mean life or death, once again the notion of the choiceless choice.
Leaving Auschwitz to know that you will return albeit the next day is a uniquely strange feeling, but we were all aware that they were to be two experiences of very different nature. So we return to my place within the crowd of 6,000 people in Auschwitz ready to embark on a walk like no other, to try and define the march itself is a hard but for me it marked such a powerful moment in time, it invoked emotions of joy of resistance and hope and privilege in particular for me and our group walking alongside and behind when we couldn’t keep up! Our incredible survivor companion Barbara, through the course of the five days Barbara through her invaluable contributions, sharing of testimony and infectious personality and attitude towards life had made such an impact on us all, and as the Hatikvah rung out around Birkenau, it was clear to all what a special journey we had undertaken.
The March of the Living trip is a journey of loss and remembrance, but also of hope and for each individual who undertakes it a unique one, consisting of different emotions, highs and lows and this is what helps to make the trip such a special one. For me it was defined not just by this but the incredible people with whom I shared it with. I couldn’t have wished for a more special group of people to be joined together with, the conversations and support network in which we shared had such a profound impact on shaping my experience. March of the Living taught me many lessons but most importantly that in the world we see and face today, never underestimate the power of a conversation and what we can do as individuals, for the only choice we have is to try and make a difference.
